The Squid Calendar

On this day, in the year of our Lord, Nineteen Hundred and Forty a great man was brought into this world. He was born for one purpose: to kick ass. This great man’s name: Chuck Norris.

“Who is Chuck Norris?“, you ask?  Simply put, he’s the guy who is going to kick you in the face for not already knowing.

Fun Facts About Chuck Norris (curtesy of @chucknorris_)

Chuck Norris invented the spoon, because killing people with a knife was just to easy.

If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.

When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.

In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.

Some kids piss their name in the snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name into concrete

Chuck Norris is now 70, and he can still kick your ass.